Cool Facts: Hetalia Style
by Miss Chelle
Summary: Random facts about various countries, acted out by the Hetalia players.
1. Chapter 1

_(Because I get inspiration from everywhere. Including a certain free app for the iTouch that includes certain "cool facts". You'll laugh. No, I promise. Sorry if the characters are OOC.)_

Cool Facts: Hetalia Style!

**The first bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin in WW2 killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.**

"Looks like that American fool was serious, after all…" Ludwig sighed heavily and sat down on a particularly large piece of rubble in his capital. He should have expected this. He did start this war, after all.

"Ve~ Germany! It wasn't that bad~! Want some-"

"No, Italy. I don't want any pasta. Japan?"

"Yes?"

"How bad?"

"The damage is relatively slight. It could have been worse."

Germany nodded, a little relived at the words. The August night was balmy and hot, and he got up again, wiping the little sweat from his forehead.

"However…" Japan continued, looking at a clipboard. "..It seems that there was some causalities at the…well, at the Berlin Zoo."

A moment of silence passed between the trio. Germany fixed his hard blue eyes on Japan, checking to see if the Asian man was kidding. It wasn't likely, since Japan rarely kidded about things.

"My….zoo? They hit my zoo?"

"It appears so."

"Japan, you know I don't like jokes."

"That's what the clipboard says, Ludwig."

Germany squinted at Japan. He really was serious!

"This, I have to see for myself."

"Ve~! Can I come to, Germany~? I wanna see the penguins!"

"Sure, Italy. Come on."

It wasn't that long of a trek to the zoo. But that didn't stop Germany's mind from wandering. _Why my zoo? Out of everything, why the __zoo__?_

"It doesn't look too bad, Germany~"

"He's right. The only animal that I can see dead is--"

Japan was cut off by Germany's strangled gasp. Japan and Italy both looked at Germany, concern written all over Japan's face, and pasta written on Italy's.

"n-nein…..Nein!! Mein Elefant!!"

The suffering German, who was prostrate with grief on the floor, was starting to attract attention, from the two nations, and the general public who were at the zoo.

"Ve~ Japan. Why is Germany on the floor like that? Is it because he didn't have enough pasta? I could make him some right now!!"

"I do not think pasta is the answer here, Italy. Perhaps Germany is just sentimental…when it comes to elephants."

_(I assume that this fact is truth. However, I do not assume this this would be Ludwig's reaction. I think it's just fun to imagine. ^^ Reviews are love! Ciao~)_


	2. Chapter 2

(_Oh, my God. I have ignored you loyal fans for so, so long. I am so sorry. Consider this an apology, yes? I will update everything else as will. I'm back, you guys.) _

Cool Facts: Hetalia Style!

**The Bank of America was once the Bank of Italy.**

A prim and proper bank manager sat at his desk, black and white pictures of his family dotted the place. He was very handsome, and very stereotypically Italian.

As the doors burst open, and a hysterical brunette dashed inside, Mr. bank manager didn't have the typical reaction. Instead, he grimaced heavily.

"What is it this time, Signor Vargas?"

"It's my pasta! It's run out again!! Me and fratello are hungry and we don't have _anything_ to eat!"

"Yes, and?"

"I need to buy some more!"

"And?!"

"Well, you see, I don't have anymore money, because I need some new paints, and I saw this really, realy pretty tomato plant for big brother Spain, and the last time big brother France was over, all of our underwear mysteriously disappeared, oh, and then I bought some dog treats, because Germany doesn't reward his doggies enough, and they look so cute with their big brown doggie eyes and--"

"Signor, am correct in assuming that you intend to take money from your bank, from your own people, to buy pasta?"

"Ve…Si!"

"No. That is theft, even if you are Italia herself."

"Himself!"

"Yes, whatever."

"But where am I supposed to get money for pasta from?"

"That isn't my concern, Signor"

"Ve……I'll trade you art for the money!"

"This is not a gallery, Feliciano."

"Pleeeease?"

Mr. bank manager sighed deeply. This was the last straw. Normal banks shouldn't have to put up with this sort of thing. It was bad enough when Italy persuade the bank to buy his entire tomato garden, or the last manager, who just let him borrow from the vaults as he pleased. No, this was quite enough.

The next month, Mr. Bank manager dusted his hands in satisfaction. He had successfully moved away from the nation of Italy, and more importantly, from the crazy personification of the nation of Italy. He figured that America would be much more reasonable, more level-headed and responsible.

"Yo! You guys are my new bank, right? Awesome. Say, can I borrow a few bucks? A growing boy like me always needs to eat, huh? Ha ha!"

Mr. Bank manager buried his face in his hands. He needed a new job.

(_Hoped you guys liked it. And once again, I am so sorry for leaving you all high and dry. Ciao, loves!)_


End file.
